Kyle's Blog

蛮稳定

2010-01-31T06:16:00.000-08:00

我和他的感情也不错啦。有些事我们都蛮坦白但我不知道他有没有，今天他告诉我用不一样的角度去看也许东西会不一样。虽然我还是那么介意那个人的存在但我会尝试的用不一样的角度去看，也许我们的感情会比较好一点，也不会为了一件小事而破坏我们两的感情。有时我真的很讨厌那个人的存在，每次都message 和 call 你。我超讨厌他耶！
有你的世界却是不一样的。我和你里面装这了甜酸苦辣虽然我跟你的日子也要1个月了。超快的~
今天早上一起身就超想你耶~

haiz..妈的！又为了那个死鬼吵了，如果那个死鬼没找他就没事了嘛，今天跟你好好的。找麻烦的死人头 =.=
其实最让我痛心是，我们两每次讲起那个死鬼我们的心情就变坏了。我想我昨天在电话的语气也不是很好但你要了解我的心情啊。对不起！我没有相信你，我知道你一定伤心因为我不信你。其实你也很了解为什么我不信你，那你至少告诉他我和你的关系啊！虽然你告诉我你和他不可能但另一方面你又告诉我他和他女友分了他又像你表白过，我也会怕的。我是暖性动物不能受伤害的你要了解。

10| 01|10

2010-01-10T03:57:00.000-08:00

Actually im not asking for somemore.. I just want her to love me as well.. when we go through the day happily sure someone will feel it and asking all the question that they shouldn't ask.. They keep asking all this question to make us face the problem.. I don't want her to feel hard to face hwe friends and i don't want her to feel pressure about the this stuff.. Why should you guys so care about this.. If we want to let you guys know both of us will automatically inform u guys..

Please!! Don't you guys make us feel pressure..

I can't forget the day when i and her hang out.. It's only me and her went to watch movie.. we was holding each other's hand.. when finished movie she automatically hold my hand and this's the day i'll remember..
I can't make sure on that day she will accept me or not but i think i have to aprecate this 1 month.. To apprecate how she treat me and how i treat her..

* If anyone know who am talking PLEASE Do Not ask me or her.. cause we need some space*

dear i will always love you all the time.. To care you more.. I really love you so much.. maybe this's the way i love you too much until make me feel pressure and jealous when you chat with others.. espeacialy him.. He told me he like you and you knew it too.. This what i jealous on.. everyone is talkin about you both and you never explain to them.. You know actually what i feel on?? It's Hurt!! I think im to jealousy and think too much but it's because i love you..
Whenever we discuss about all this question and you told me you don't hope to let them know everytime i will feel sad.. I always told you i understand but actually i dont understand.. why you still scared about all this.. can you format all last memory with her?? Just save all me and you's memory enough.. Maybe im too selfish only think about myself never think what you feel but .. I don't know i think im selfish..

07|01|10

2010-01-07T06:26:00.000-08:00

Finally she accept me (although is it tryin time in 1month) but im happy with her too.. I wish that she will accept me.. i'll miss u all the time.. luv ya!!

时间的问题

2010-01-03T01:07:00.000-08:00

其实我很希望你能接受我但如果你觉得很难的去接受那你暂时不用在考虑了。你就直接选择暧昧好了。其实暧昧也不错。我不是在逼你，只是想给你一个好的答案去选。因为我等你的答案已11天了，我快要发疯了。我知道你真的需要的是时间但我。。我想我还是慢慢的去学习等待吧。

Now raining and im siting in my floor drinking shampion should be very enjoy but in my memory is thinking about her and WHY in my head..

01|01|10 Fri 11:48AM

2009-12-31T19:46:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!! Actually im not so happy with my last 31 december 09 because i watch movie without You countdown without You even eat also without You.. I miss You all the time.. I should let you go cause im not ur whom even if you are my girl i'll let you go too.. This's what we call freedom.. right? If i let you go you will feel more happy then go ahead even if i feel sad that you not along with me.. As good as you feel happy then i'll happy too.. I'll always respect your opinion..

Actually you still remember to answer me?? Im still waiting your answer.. When can you give me your answer?? I really hope that you can be my girl.. Maybe you need survey or make sure the feeling is that true or not .. or maybe you need time to prove me .. or you need time to recover your last memory.. i know.. i understand.. but trust me i wont be the one who leave you and dont you feel bad if u break up with me.. Actually got On sure got Break dont you mind so much.. You have to try atleast we got fun before.. 1 more thing that i can make sure that we can be like last time even if we break.. trust me! Still remember that last time with my ex also the same what..

Sometime when he touch you i'll feel so angry.. I don't know you know about that or not but sometime i feel like u got abit feel to him.. This's the way i feel scared..

I really need your answer to make sure that you love me.. Please!!!
I dont know why you still dont want to answer me?? we almost treat it as gf bf already why dont you accept me?? If not pleace Reject me then i'll recover it from now onward.. Anyway i promise it before that i can treat you like last time.. please.. I hope to know your answer as soon as possible...

what i feel

2009-12-29T08:08:00.000-08:00

When can i give me a real answer to me?? When can i get the answer from you?? I really hope to know as soon as possible.. may i?? Nowadays you cant show me that u got feel to me actually.. Last time still can feel it now no more.. Where's the feel?
Actually im so sad that u told me i wont to go mr ong's event.. You said u want to go with ur friends even if he''s event not on 31th.. Sad case.. haiz You make my mood worst you know.. Im hurt almost because of you.. sometime i really cant stop thinking about you did you??
Sometime i gave me feel you are not really got feel to me.. You told me that you cant realise that i love you but i also cant realise ur feel too.. this's truth..

A Bad X'mas Day! [ 24th + 25th ]

2009-12-24T10:32:00.000-08:00

24 december 09 Night
This's x'mas day is the most hard to over even if i stay at home better than went out.. Im so regret that i asking them to hang out for celebrated this bad x'mas!! Whatever time would pass it 1 sec by 1 sec.. No point for me to feel not well if she dont like me but at the same time why dont she straight to tell me that she dont like me then maybe i would hurt a few days then after a few days i will be come back from normal.. but she never tell me YES or No.. what she want? Actually she never accept me also no wrong.. i should said she suppose to reject me.. cause im not a good couple.. i cant be anyone's couple too.. Whatever!!! i dont care.. right who care?? im not the one who care.. Im repeat NOT the one who care... i should not 'jiak chor' i know that she's try to make me jealous but she did it and i kena.. fine i cant tahan what i saw just now.. damn syok! Im repeat .. damn SYOK!!! i should use syok to explain what i feel.. feeling good.. long time never get the kind of feel hurt when i smile.. it's really hurt... cool!!! i love it!!!
Am i insane?? excatly man.. you're insane bitch!!!

25 Decmber 09
Today was fun!! Although 3 of us 3pm only go fetch yl and eat breakfast.. when 24night i was cant sleep whole night.. her head headache also but she got sleep better than i.. Then i chat with her at midnight cause she cant sleep also until 7 something nearly 8 only we tryin to sleep but i still cant sleep until now 26 december 09 12.07am only feel sleepy.. now the way she sleep different like last time d.. she never hug me but.. i hug her sleep.. Actually whole day cant sleep also because of her nia.. 24night really make me damn angry!!!
Today we was going to Jun there celebreate.. at Ultimaxx queensbay there celebrate.. there got alot of pretty girls there we some more take photo with them.. damn cool and syok..hahh
After finished the function we went to pasar malam there then sent yl back.. i and cindy sent her until infront of her house.. then i n cindy walked back to ah hong's car..

im nerves

2009-12-23T02:28:00.000-08:00

Actually should i ask?? My feeling tell me that she dont like me.. Actually yesterday im preparing to tell her d but this stupid malay tb ask her first then me stop askin her d.. Like just now i just try to tell her but she answer me dont play.. means what??

More closer will get far distance

2009-12-18T18:35:00.000-08:00

Although both of us closer but our distance will getting far.. Sometime i feel .. No, i dont know how to explain what i feel.. Like yesterday she just left me alone even my neck was feel pain also she never care.. Maybe i feel is correct.. soong i think u are wrong.. Maybe this time ur 6sense is wrong but i wont scold u cause sometime everyone also will sence wrong something.. it's ok cause i sence it d.. Im not that lucky to have this kind of .. what .. * sigh* whatever .. (dont u think too much, just leave it! Dont Care!!)

My feeling will always be there for u but .. maybe i dont know how to treat u as good as possible.. Actually im thinking to ask u even if u reject me.. This's what soong teach.. Just wanna know the answer and u know what?! I will going to ask her on the special day even if she reject will get me hurt in the special day when the next time will remind me but i wanted to ask her on that day maybe face to face will more better than on phone.. I know that day on phone got that chance to ask but i think not that good for me.. I just wanna try face to face ask her..

I know i cant be a good partner, cause im not perfect.. I cant give what she need.. Shit! What the hell am i talking about.. No! No! No! Am i INSANE ?? huh
Never mind le. Dont know how many times i had been get rejected from people but she's the one that can make me feel .. different.. It's different feel to others..
Maybe i should hope that it's fail when i ask cause if fail mean the story didnt start and my hurt would not come to me after we break.. Is it?

模糊

2009-12-16T03:37:00.000-08:00

模糊的世界几时才会变得精彩一点？我越来越搞不清楚事情的来源了。他真的让我觉得很模糊，搞不清楚他要的是什么，我跟不了解他在想些什么。有时对我很好，有时又对我很冷淡，好像今天他对我也蛮冷淡一下。我陪他走到天桥那边就个走个路，但我们却一声的再见也没有。有时他真的让我觉得很痛心。其实我应该要跟他告白吗？我真的搞不清楚他到底要的是什么。虽然我问了他而他也告诉我了，但在他们的开玩笑下我还是会很不爽。

我也搞不清楚为何我会跟他们玩一份，其实我是在掩饰着我不喜欢他吗？其实为什么这次我会怕给人知道我喜欢的是他？现在只有3个人知道我喜欢谁，3个人对我来说真的很多了其实1个就足够了。我想还有一个人会猜到，以他的智商我想他会知道。只是他不问我不讲罢了。

其实有一个疑问在我心里很久了，我一直都不敢问他。这次我什么都不敢讲，有时开玩笑的讲几句其实是真心话。不像以前什么都说，有多想念那个人我都会把这都告诉那个人。这次真的很秘密。

在我们爬山的那一天，我真的很担心他，他好像不大会照顾自己。我们到了目的地我就离开了他，这样就流血了。那杀那其实我很想冲去看他有没有事但我又怕被人发现。幸好没事，如果好像wloon那样我真的会很心疼。

有时我有一种冲动想把他紧紧的抱这他。他的某一些话真的能把我的心给抓住，虽然有时他对我不理不睬。其实喜欢一个人不可以太宠他，他会变得欺负你。因为他知道你会很宠他，那他就欺负你了。

Keep Thinking & Guessing

2009-12-12T07:57:00.000-08:00

HELP!!!!!!! Should i? Should i ask? My god! Today after hiking left me and soong. I and her keep thinking negative but i know soong's trying to help me up but i still no confident to myself. I cant thinking of this.. This's my first feeling that i have been feel. I just cant stop thinking about her.. My head is all appear her in my mind.. Even just now i was went out with eling aiyin and soong i still thinking about her.. When counting star also will thinking about her when she asked me to count stars and when i on phone with her..
I miss u..
Actually i wanna ask u a question but no confident with myself.. Im scared to get the answer.. Im still thinking cause im not sure yet.. What should i do?? I was thinking a few hours d but still dont know how.. Complicated!!!
Sometime she will make me feel got but sometime she will make me feel no.. Im still guessing guessing.. Should i ask?? will i success?? I so nerves about the answer even is she dont like me.. I really wanted to know her answer.. Yesterday really miss her but she said lazy to come to Jelutong Xpress there.. cause me hang out with chow aiyin and yvonne.. She hang out with her friend too.. Haiz.. counting the start while thinking of her.. I wanted to count star with her.. sometime when i dare to ask that time she sure make me change my mind.. Haiz im useless..

你在我心目中的地位

2009-12-06T03:41:00.000-08:00

你啊竟然在我心目中的地位以变了，变得很重要。每一次的节目都需要你的陪伴耶，那你想你的地位有多高吗？有什么好东西去享受我一定会是第一个想到的就是你。
但今天你的讯息发送得很慢甚至没发送给我，你是怎么了？还是你在忙？其实我没期望些什么，我只是想知道你有没有喜欢我罢了。

就那么几分钟的相处

2009-12-01T04:53:00.001-08:00

今天我对他有一种“依依不舍”的感觉。当我一位朋友叫他走时我真的很想陪他去。今天我和他的相处只有5或10分钟而已，还是几分钟的相处。这几天和他的相处时间太长了，现在只有那么几分钟的相处又点困难。
现在有点让我觉得想念和等待他能渐渐的变成我的嗜好了。早上等着他睡醒了上网，下午等着见他，晚上等着他放工。就在现在的时间是来想念他。其实每当我讲他和那个人我都会很害怕说他会喜欢上他。有时他们两被讲时我会觉得很生气有时能忍或陪他们讲。其实这对我的伤害还蛮强，也许这就是我的性格吧。
每当我和你相处的时间都让我觉得有幸福的感觉。是你让我又了希望是你让我开心了，你改变了我吗？
其实人总是要为自己所说的每一句负责。我很后悔的把我所说的话告诉了他(Theng) 下次的必密都不会告诉他了。太恐怖了！这是所以我不相信人与人的信任。表面他是没有可能那么无聊讲出来那里知道有人那么无聊，他能为了一天的开心换了我们的信任。我对他真的很失望。开玩笑的都告诉了别人。我想他一定把我所说的东西告诉了他们。很失望真的很失望！
时间的冲忙让我觉得很模糊，不知所做。
其实我很想告诉他我喜欢他但这几天看到他们的失败让我很害怕。我不想失去任何东西。我也不能选择我要的路线。时间，工作，金钱，情人，亲人哪一个比较重要？还是自己比较重要呢?

Having a new choice

2009-11-29T07:23:00.000-08:00

I get a new choice now.. love a people not really want te having her/him. As long as i can feel she's happy enough.. That pacific wei lun correct. Wont get a future from them then dont ask better right.. like what wei lun keep thinking he wont get her good news from her.. keep thinking negative.. If to me i reather dont want to ask.. Stay beside her care about her and watch her.. Really dont want lose her.. Before old friend ask me go ahead trying to having her actually before im trying to chase her now i think like what wei lun kena im scared redi. iI think i will keep cause i scared she will reject me like yens reject wei lun.. really hurt.. i knew this feeling so much

miss (im having a problem)

2009-11-27T21:25:00.001-08:00

this recently im so happy to be with her but at the same time i got much pressure too..i went everywhere also think she will beside me. If im free i'll find a day to hang out even there is nothing to shop or no place to go also wanna ask her out cause a day whithout her my time will pass damn slow.. like the time how she work.. pass damn slow. I hope that your day when u feel sad, boring, happy also will still remember me and i'll stay beside you when u feel sad, boring even feel excited and happy..
What problem am i having you know?? The problem is im dont know whether she like me or not and the way she treat me like ya but i feel no.. I dont even dare to think ya cause i feel this's impossible that she can like me..
Actually if she like me also i feel dont wanna ask her to be mine cause i really scared to lose her but my one of my friend told me why if got chance dont want go? She was scolded me Crazy. Am i crazy?? When she talk about her ex or her ex's friends i'll feel .... is it sad? like beh syok.
Let me tell some secret here..sometime i got a feeling like wanna hug n kiss her. She can actually attract me.. Although she not damn pretty in this world but sometime when i see her i'll feel cute.. Sometime she did something that can make my heart feel jumping or maybe long time never get this feelin but she can actually took my heart away.
Maybe like what Yvonne told me about pressure can slowly cover it. need sometime only. Until now i still cannot cover all this or maybe i feel no confident to myself or maybe she still cant show me her love.
Anyway im crapin so much here and keep guessin but i still dont know whether she like me or not.. Me damn funny..

Sad Case

2009-11-23T08:33:00.000-08:00

Actually today surpose to be very happy we went to watched movie ( Dying Breed) then go CC played (Left 4 Dead) then after went to ate wan tan mee while finished eaten we was going to Station 1 played Tumbling Tower & playin Card actually we was played until damn happy but after she saw her ex. That time me really beh song.. She still care about her ex? or just feel paiseh? i want to know the answer.. Im glad that i slept her leg she never push me away.. I know me almost will think too much cause she wont like me.. I feel like wanna ask her to be my.. but i scared to lose her too.. What can i do??

Acutally i feel so inferior cause everytime when i went out with her she will almost look at all the handsome guy (tb) even she knew some of them. I think 1 day i'll be more nice than them.. I'll try to change my style.. now my mom reject me. I can wait..
Sure that i hope to protect her care her.. The problem is can i make it or not.
Can anyone know so much of pressure do i having now?? Haiz.

超伤的我还能做什么? 心痛又怎样，伤心又如何？他是不会明白也不会了解。

what she thinking of?

2009-11-22T09:18:00.001-08:00

she really told me whatever she had been happened last time when she and her ex. Is it she dont want lie me so tell me all or just wanna share with me and treat me as a very good friend? actually i cant reliaze that what she feel.. too deep to undersatnd about her..

A Day To Penang National Marathon

2009-11-21T19:37:00.000-08:00

Penang National Marathon was a big event to Penang. It's fun to went there althought im not involve. haha You know what me my bro and bro-in-law's bro went to there for shooting. How fun can u guys inmagine that? we was 11-bus to Penang Briage. we was walked until half of the Penang Briage.
Me was carried a bag, a DSLR, a Marco lens and 1 tripod
bro carried such a big bag about 3kg all including 3lens+ such a big USM lens, a DSLR, 1 tripod
bro-in-law's bro was carried a bag, a DSLR and 1 tripod (i never try to look what he bring actually)
If im not mistaken we had been walked around 10 something kilometer. Kinda far. I saw christine too.. She was went there for rc duty.

can u feel me?

2009-11-20T09:47:00.000-08:00

i release that she still care about her ex.. she just told me she n her ex 1 year d. what should i reply her?? i feel so beh syok actually.. she some more asked me why so quiet. can she feel it actually?? can she feel that i like her?? i guess no.. i always am si her keep telling her maybe she thought im joking but actually im not jokin at all.. everytime i told u i miss u actually is true.. im serious too but i guess u will be kidding..
Everytime when u tell me about ur ex or ur ex's friends i will feel sad to heard about this.. Actually can u feel me?? i hope that u will if u like me.. if not then i reather u cant feel it..
Now is already 3.08am im still chatting with her..actually im so happy to be with her..i really hope 1 day when i chase her and she accept me..haha.. Now is already 3.24am she said she wanna sleep d.. Nitez!

Pressure

2009-11-17T10:02:00.001-08:00

Sometime went out with her i feel so pressure.. She always met some unnessasery friends or not suppuse to meet.
She keep sayin dont want meet them again.. She still mind her X?
Actually this problem im not suppose to go in and ask but i cant thinkin all this..
I never said that she's 100% like me even 5% but i can make sure that me 100% like her..
Im trying to pretend dont know anything but i cant, my heart wll still worry.
Im still care about what people said about her.When i went out with her really happy but i cant tahan all the things that she had been went throght.
I feel so pressure..
Actually i feel so pressure about everything..
I wish to talk to the 1 cannot talking & thinkin stuff to listen to me.
I dont mean that i cant trust who or who.. I just feel that this's the way that i feel more confurtable..

Is that getting closer?

2009-11-16T09:19:00.000-08:00

Is that getting closer? Im so happy to with her but everytime when she talk about her X i'll feel not feeling well.. My heart was stuck like a rubber stuck in the hole to block the way of water..
17 november 09 me cindy roxasl yannlin jun jimmy & xiao mi went to gurney watched 2012. not bad. Nice also. so the list of the place is:

Screen
Jun, yannlin, me, cindy, jimmy, roxasl, xiao mi

Me really glad to with her.. just now she invited me n roxasl watch movie on mon too.. cause next mon is your holidays!!

Now is already 1:28am 17 November 09 Tuesday
feeling sleepy but she already online..
im chatting with her now.. but actually im feeling sleepy right now..

16 november 09 (sun)

2009-11-15T08:58:00.000-08:00

why every girls who close to me sure want to did until like suka me ane?? or i think too much?? should be.. i know she wont like me but today i saw her phone photo i was feeling different.. i dont know why..
actually today im so happy but after the photo i feel so beh song.. im tryin to asking her who she like but she said no.. when she ask me back actually i wanna think to tell her but i feel it is unessusry to tell her.. cause she dont like me.. be friend better..
we was going to CC then Prangin after night go station 1 chattin there.. im glad to went out with her..really

Is That A New Country Here?

2009-11-14T03:49:00.000-08:00

Is that wrong if i never go to take car lesen? Why everyone keep asking me to go take.. I know it is bring a lot of trouble to people..
I dont know why all the people will think a war game, basketball, football and all that is allow guy to play only wont feel weird?? What wrong if girl play?? Nothing's go wrong what.. Is just a game why wanna think so much?? I dont know why..

But i so happy to play the game (Left 4 Dead) really nice.. YL you are true.. when play the game we wont feel the pain we will only play until very excited..Nice!! Great!!Awesome!!!

Im glad to play the game.. And im glad to hang out with her too.. although she wont like me.. tomorrow she wanna follow me go CC play game.. I cant believable.. I though she will feel sien or what.. how i know just now was message me and can she go..cool. but i scared she will feel boring there.. I hope she wont feel boring..
cause she n her fren work at 6pm tomorrow so no place to go first she invited me to go out then i answer YL n ah hong go CC already then bo bian..haha but at last she wanna follow too..

Tired but never give up

2009-11-10T04:40:00.000-08:00

When we going to finaly really tired.. All of us will almost did until 3-4am even until 5 or 6am sleep. not even 1 day is almost 2 or 3 days plus.haiz.. but after pass up mr ong got said good thing such as our homework not bad..good.. then i'll feel better even not feel bored to do this homework.. feel interesting too.

Let me talk about her.. me almost accompany her everyday go work and eat even with her friends too. today ask me to accompany her go work cause all her friends no work.. sometime i really cannot understand her..outside look really guai but inside look im not sure..i dont mean she bad la.. i just feel im not so knowin her so deep lo..but because of her me this few days feel happy already.. something i feel that she got feel to me but to me sure no chance ae la..dont think too much hor..haiz
but sometime when she touch my hair i got some feeling 1.touch me like a kid 2. she wanna touch me? im waiting im waiting + sleepy!!!

Just looked around to someone's profile

2009-11-04T17:06:00.000-08:00

3 of them are sis i guess 3 of them (sisters) will in good relationship cause they are walkin on the same road..When 3 oh them 21th's birthday(in same date) they had a praty which is only allow girls n tbs.Guy are not allow. I dont know why all of the them (tb) can found such a pretty girlfriend(3 of them).I can say this's the only couple or lesbian that i seen is the most perfect in real life. They never mix with guy thier boyfriends sure no worry about guy is only worry about tboy. What if i mix with them? Actually i got a bit jealous about them.. Why can them(tb) can found a good? girlfriends n pretty girlfriends here.. Can i have it? hahaha Anti dreaming here.LOL
Such a pretty girls can only like tb.. can u imagine that? Im repeat such a pretty girls.. i really cannot imagine..

等待的爱情

2009-11-03T06:10:00.000-08:00

虽然我不了解他（新目标），我也不了解自己有没有喜欢他，我也不否认说他喜欢我因为这是最基本的对待。其实我很高兴他能跟我分享他的过去。当然我也有跟他分享我的过去。
最近我一直在等她online但他没开因为他告诉我说功课多不想online.虽然他不是很美也很普通，但我还是喜欢普通的。
最近我对那个让我失望的人不是很好，也算有谈但不自于好。
其实让我最不开心的是，每当我喜欢那个人我哥都会跟那个人有关。虽然我也有份讲但不是来自真心话。我自所以要讲是要显示我对他的爱，不过我会尝试的去当没发生。吃醋是我的专长，我会去克服它！！
我知道他是不会接受我，但等待也是一种乐趣，我会珍惜！

竟然有人让我心淡了(真真的觉得心淡）

2009-10-26T02:00:00.000-07:00

越让我想不到的东西越会发生。今天的我真的很不顺利。遇想不到的东西已发生了。事情的发生越让我很难接受，我一直都在安慰我自己劝我自己但事情遍遍一在而三的让我难过。虽然不能看到我的泪向眼睛流下，但在我心里都一直流个不停。谁能真真的听到我的哭声？谁能真真的去了解我关心我愿意为我？有谁能了解我，从不了解直到了解？

现在人类让我觉得心淡了。我不会在放朋友在重要的位子了，就算你对他怎么在好也没用了。现在我真的能了解到‘好心没好报’这几个日了。我每一个好朋友都一在而三的让我伤心，伤害我，让我觉得很心痛无敌。剩至让我最心疼和失望的又是他。
我能为朋友而牺牲但他们却这样的对我。
虽然他不能每次都陪伴着我们出去但他能给我一个好的回忆和让我觉得我会很珍惜他这个朋友。但他遍遍要让我改变了我的主意。为什么要改变了我了人生？不能让我开心又要让我伤心。
这两次的回忆都会记在我心里，因为第一次的出去是最开心的一天，第二次的出去也是最后一次让我觉得最难忘的一天了。

我想过要对他坏一点但我一在而三的控制这我自己，钱我也想跟他讨回但每一次都没有，这是算笨还是好？不用猜也知道是笨啦！他跟你很亲吗？
一直以来我为我所做的一切都是好的，直到现在我觉得全部都是因为我笨，[甘愿为他人死，到最后他们会说是你犯奸] 那你就会死的很不甘愿和不值得。

我看这也是我自己拿来的，每一个人都要为他们所说的一切负责。

我竟然掉了眼泪，当时我跟他说时我的眼泪竟然掉个不停。我真的很伤心，我该说些什么？很爽，我以把眼泪都排出来了。但心里还是有个刺了。
明天又要逼我的一幅装开心的样子了。好难顶！

他开结了我吗？

2009-10-16T03:02:00.000-07:00

原来呀，当你恨那个人或讨厌那个人的时候他又会在某一分钟变成你的爱人或你仰慕的人。今天放学过后我和雁琳两人到得他的房间。我们也讨论了大概1个小时，我真的觉得舒服多。
我现在也不会那么看不开了。
我会尝试的去接受这一切。承受我的负担及压力，他讲的话虽然很多但他对我讲的也不多而且我听的也不少，但琳的经历也要跟我一样所以他讲的话我们都能接通。
虽然我很讨厌他但他能开结了我们一点，终算有帮到我们。我还是要说生谢！

我该怎么办？

2009-10-14T18:12:00.000-07:00

我真的没办法在坚持下去了。很难受！有谁知道我的难受？有谁会了解？事情让我觉得越来越复杂了。这些事情让我无法让我有个真真的生活。每一分钟的我都心无在焉。现在我的生活过得很冲淡，虽然我早上是在玩但我心还是想尽办法完成我的功课，上课时走来走去没事做等放学，放学了就睡觉，到了6点起床回家online一下，到了9点又睡觉直到天亮，这样就过了一天。我整天都心无在焉的，连电话都一直忘了拿甚至钱包也忘了带。好像昨天我又忘了拿手机。我心到底藏了多少东西在里面？
这么多年已来让我觉得最严重的就是这次了。这几天都不能让我平静下来。我真的怕有一天我变成精神分裂。好像那件事可算是小事，但我好像不大放得下。我以告诉了我自己，这件是过了就算，但我会变得肯生气，我也会一直在怪责自己。
我每一次回到家都装做一幅没事的样子。到了学校又不能太明显。
其实我真的很想去外走走，我想也不能让我一直在忽思乱想。

拜托，你可以不要忽思乱想吗？
你想我要吗？我也不想亚。
你可要放松自己，免得你会啃痛苦，放肆自己会好多。
我也想放肆自己但有些东西不是我控制的来，你明白吗？
你听我讲..
不，够了我不想在听了！
痛苦是你自找的你明白吗？
够了好吗？我真的不想在听下去了。。拜托！！

现在，在金钱方面真的很有问题，现在我拿了1500块他们都没钱了，其实我想告诉他们不如我不要读了，这样辛苦。大多数都每一天在讲金钱，不然就为了那件店而吵，每一次妈在讲那个女人爸就会毫无意思的生气，他是怎么了？我真的受够了。
我的人生突然变得一片灰暗。做什么都觉得好无疑意。什么都变得不重要了。目标也慢慢的消失了。。
昨天如果住久家我就不想起床了，就这样睡到明天。因为睡觉对我来说是最太平了。虽然醒了也不想起床。好累也！

Lin 我也希望有個人來在乎我

My Tuesday

2009-10-13T21:06:00.000-07:00

Yesterday i really feel happy to went out with theng & yen. I really have fun.. I almost laugh until back. Since when i just step outside the door. The feeling to me was long time ago. I had long time never been like this. Miss the moment.. Yesterday is the 1st time theng fetch me out but next time fetch people before u think u want fetch that people back or not. If not don't ask she/him out. Remember!
Im so happy to hang out with yen. Cause let me feel No worry, No trouble..

We still went to find may. ha, She still remember my b'day. Anyway im not going to celebrate also.. but thanks you can still remmeber..
Walau really miss the time we was together..

毫无意义

2009-10-07T21:44:00.000-07:00

我的看法突然有点改变。突然觉得‘重要’的意义也没有。 O.o 无聊的我好像变了有点冷血动物。看法却不同了。

我真不明白为什么他明明就要跟她去看戏为和又要我去做电灯泡。我想他也是在利用我来靠近她虽然我跟她不是很熟到很要好，但毕竟他们也会慷慨或被人讲闲话如果我没去。我很讨厌人利用我。尤其是‘他’为了要靠近她然后装着对我很好。你以为我不知道吗？而另外一个是‘她’只会利用我叫我作这个作那个。如果真的有一天我不在帮他们你觉得他们还会对我好吗？现时的世界真恐怖。真不能让人想象。

她怎样对我，我会牢牢的记住她怎样对待我但我不会还给她，我会好好的对待她。

还有我真的很生气很生气院长讲的那句话。我真的很在意。我要他向我道歉！！！
其实院长，他应该要为我们所讲的每一句和所有他讲的一切要负责任但他没有。好像这种院长是不会有人尊敬他的。

让我最生气的一天

2009-10-06T07:13:00.000-07:00

妈的，我真的恨不得想杀掉你。干你妈子拜。今天太不顺利了。忍，我一定会忍！

爱情之大地震在二零零九年十月一号（无聊编）

2009-10-01T09:42:00.000-07:00

某个人虽然在你心目中不是什么重要的人但有一天那个人突然间消失在你生活中，你会感到怎样？你会想他/她吗？你会想打电话给他/她吗？想听到他/她的存在或声音吗？你想见他/她吗？你能真真的珍惜你所拥有的一切吗？

其实我问过一个人如果发生一个不兴的事情，你第一个时间会想起谁？那个人直接回复了我。其实这个答案不是很明确。因为到了这一刹那他/她才会在你脑部出现。你才会发现说原来他/她在你心目中的位置不只是那么简单。虽然你不能每天见到他/她，但你会制动的想念他/她。不过你不会觉得事情的发现。因为你还在迷糊之中。你还不会寻找。但在你模糊之中也能偏偏找回你所要的某些东西。就算你每天都能见到他/她也未必会感觉到。

虽然他/她现在在你心目中不是最重要的，但在某一天他/她有可能会突然变成你最重要的人物。有可能你现在发现不到他/他的存在还是永远都发现不到，但我相信他/她会永远都会默默的在旁边支持您。那是叫爱吗？真真的爱是怎样？你了解吗？牺牲每个人都能说得出，就算那一点的小牺牲通畅的人也办得到。在说真真的牺牲不是没个人办得到的事情。

虽然他/她之前得不到你时，他/她都会想尽办法让你开心，一旦得到你的心或人都不会在珍惜你。他/她都会慢慢的对你所做的一切感到厌倦或烦。这就是人类吗？

你能真真的找到‘天长地久’吗？以前未必没有，我是新世纪的年代我不敢讲旧世纪的情况。不过我能确定的说，新时代的人肯定跟旧时代的人很大的分别。

人类只会一直提醒自己曾经度过的坏印象，不会去提醒自己曾经度过的好印象。一旦失去，好的印象都会慢慢的浮上岸。那时你才发觉到世界还有很多东西能让你觉得肯美妙。上帝根本就没放弃你，是你自己放弃了自己。那是最可怕的事情。

在这个世界不是色彩就是黑暗。这是看你的想法和你的选择，色彩与黑暗，你会选择留那一个在你生活中？

你能感受一下我整偏的作文吗？慢慢轻轻的关上你的眼睛去感受吧！但我希望您能用好的方面去感受，别误解了。

Jesse McCartney - How Do You Sleep

2009-09-27T21:33:00.000-07:00

It's been about a year now
ain't seen or heard from you
I've been missing you crazy
how do you, how do you sleep
I found the letter you wrote me
it still smells just like you
damn those sweet memories
How do you, how do you sleep, how do you sleep.

I tried my best at moving on have yet to find a girl like you
I see things that I didn't before and I'm wishing I had more time with you,
How do you stay awake knowing all I do is think of you
All the things we thought about that never will happen again if I could just see you

If I had my way I'll come and get you girl
In your favorite car with the missing top
man around my way where we used to park and did all those things to steal your heart
(Chorus 2x)

It's been about a year now
ain't seen or heard from you
I've been missing you crazy h
ow do you, how do you sleep
I found the letter you wrote me
it still smells just like you damn those sweet memories
How do you, how do you sleep, how do you sleep.

Baby all that I hear from my friends again and again and again (they come and ask about you) (they say) we saw your girl at the game and damn we gotta say a big mistake by you.
Not only does your body bang but I miss the conversation too
Tell me that you couldn't sleep can't think can't eat till I come see you
If I had my way
I'll come and get you girl

In your favorite car with the missing top
man around my way where we used to parkand
did all those things to steal your heart
It's been about a year now ain't seen or heard from you
I've been missing you crazy how do you, how do you sleep
I found the letter you wrote me it still smells just like you damn those sweet memories
How do you, how do you sleep, how do you sleep
It's been about a year now ain't seen or heard from you
I've been missing you crazy how do you, how do you sleep
I found the letter you wrote me it still smells just like you damn those sweet memories
How do you, how do you sleep, how do you sleep

HATE OCT

2009-09-27T20:13:00.000-07:00

I HATE OCTOBER SO MUCH

无名氏

2009-09-27T18:12:00.000-07:00

人群之中让我最伤的就是她。埙坏他人是一个不良习惯，不管在哪一个方面都有人会这样。谁管得着。

你啊，真叫我羡慕。你能那么大胆写下这么大的‘我喜欢你’好佩服哦！可算是勇敢了。你的勇敢真叫我说声赞不可。哈哈。但我告诉你，有一些话或字不可随便说或写，不然你会后悔。要好好的记住。别把我的话当成一边风。虽然我不是教你或指导你，我只是提醒你。记得要牢牢的记住我的话。哈哈！
有时我觉得我很白痴无敌。专门干那些无聊的事。

其实我的坏处还蛮多一下，反而好处又算不出来。我没办法算出我的好处在那儿。

昨天我真的很生气，但我又资格生气吗？没有。我真的觉得不公平。
我现在觉得越来越累。每天都要用那种语言讲话。好累也。

Food Poisioning Or Sunburn

2009-09-25T07:51:00.000-07:00

I don't think is Sunburn le.. maybe Food Poisioning.. Feeling not well today.. feeling wanna vomit. Shit! Damn it!
I kinda sad when siao kia ling told me she will going to leave but don't know when..haiz
Today actually almost will feel happy but after heard what she said.. make me feel sad. I don't mean that lu hai wa but .. haiz nothing already le..
Actually she gave me a feeling to told me that she very excited to leave us.. You damn bad just leave us like that.. hate u lo..
虽然我很自持你的选择但我也很讨厌你的选择。我真的很讨厌也。其实如果我出声留你，我可算是自私，不果我很想把你留下来啦。如果能留着你我愿意成为一个自私的我，我说真的。有可能你会觉得很好笑或白痴但我只是想告诉你。

Thursday

2009-09-23T19:48:00.000-07:00

Heavy Rain, Yesterday nite was raining. Kinda cold. Feel comfurtable when the wind was blow to me.. *Enjoyed*

Wei, Siao Kia Ling you sure you want leave d meh? ni zhen de she de wo men ma? bu guo wo hei hen ken ting de kao su ni wo si bu she de ni lo.. Sure i hope you will not leaving.
What if you are not in the class anymore?? I never think it before.. haha will you feel funny i wrote all this? Sure, i kinda feel funny but seriously i really hope you wont leave us la..
Actaully i asked so many time also you will leave.. is it Useless? Hundred and thousand time i ask also you wont listen to me one right?
Anyway i'll actually surport what you choose.. This's ur choice, life or maybe can call as 'game' so you have to select what you want, what you need..
What can i answer you if you tell me you going to leave soon?? Ask you to stay? Will you listen to me? No ofcause..haha

Raining Day ( What am i suppose to do? )

2009-09-21T23:44:00.000-07:00

Oppss.. Today's raining day! Heavy rain here.. What am i gonna do now? Althought i still got homework haven't done yet.
Movie? some of the DvD my laptop can't use. =.=
Design my homework? Quite lazy.
Sleep? Just woke up.
Play online games? Feel boring.
Chat? No topic.
Message ling? No reply =.=lll
Go to school? Holiday x.x
Hang out with friends? no event
Hang out with tiff? Feel left out (so not going)

What am i suppose to do!!!!!
Why holiday until so many days?!?!
Damn boring!!
Some more no people invite..haiz
(accept Tiff but feel will kena left out later so im not going)

21 september 09

2009-09-20T12:44:00.000-07:00

Im sorry for that cause im going to use chinese to continue..

20 september 09 我和他们去了 Balik Pulau ,Pulau Betong, Jetty.
但在Balik Pulau 途中我竟然想念着一个人。我真的想念她也，我真的不敢相信。我真的不敢相信我会在次的想念她。我不因该在想念她的，她不会喜欢我的，所以说啊！不要放希望在她身上。在说，他还是喜欢她的。虽然他跟我说他对她只是有Feeling。但在他跟我说时，我心总时觉得不安。如我先在所做的一切都一样，在显示这我没那种感觉。我也不想对她有什么感觉，因为她跟本不喜欢我。我跟本就没资格喜欢一个人。我根本就不能让人幸福还是快乐。
没联络她的日子好像有点怪。

算了吧！我也不想再烦些我根本得不到的东西。专心在读书方面，但我不能担保我做得到但我会经我的力。我不需要忘了她。我只需要刻意的忘掉她，我只需要当做没发生过。那是最好的选择。

关于我的生日

2009-09-18T18:02:00.000-07:00

你知道为什么我在今年不想过生日吗？就是因为我没一次的生日都过得不是很开心，虽然我朋友都来庆祝跟我，但没人能为我庆祝生日。在我生日那天也不是很开心。每一年的生日都不能让我觉得有难忘得一天。难忘的一天真的是太难了。

所以这是我不想在庆祝的原因。因为我不想在发生多一次。而且我也不想让他们破费。好像Derrick 他生日我都没送他。所以我也不敢去要他的礼物。

幸福的祝福，我就满足了。
在我 FORM3 那一年开始我就不是很其待 23号的来令。有一年肯死，完全忘了我自己的生日。还要人来提醒我。现在的生日对我来说不是什么很大不了的事情了。有或没有都过个谱同的日子。

Hopeless

2009-09-11T07:22:00.000-07:00

Actually today's movie not bad quite funny.. but how funny is the show also i feel bored.. Im so sweat =.=lll
I can realise that this few day i in class different jor..
What can i say about my feeling now?
ERm..
..HOPELESS..
Ya, That's my feeling..

You know what?!
How i treat him like how she treat me.. it's the same case.. so now i know what he feel but i have to do this cause i dont like him and she did it too..
Today i really talk with Roxasl.. he can understnad me.. finally.. but i told him liao i feel angry about what they did.. i really angry..

ok I'll promise myself that next post will got a good post here..
no more sad post..
One more thing.. i will tryin to forget you totally.. This is my job now..
I don't want to like/love anyone anymore..'
I just wanna be a playful...
can i make it?

我的回忆不是我 - 海鸣威

2009-09-10T17:36:00.000-07:00

歌曲：我的回忆不是我 - 海鸣威

伤心的总会任性
灰心的总会用气力
将最好的过去将最多的细碎
锁到属于你的眼睛
失恋的不够耐心
失恋的不信是注定
于最黑的世界
于最光的刹那感动
属于你的气息
即使很多一起过的
想起的通通你的
为着是浪漫的爱情
通通都可再见但承诺可再听
什么可不变色oh baby
当晚与你记住蒲公英
今晚偏偏想起风的清劲
回忆不再受制于我我承认
回忆也许你的
当晚与你记住流水声
今晚站在大地自己倾听
难道送别你回头总是虔诚
谁能怪我总是太感性
失恋的都有惰性
失恋的都记住约定
当理想的世界
当理想的刹那
因爱无分你的我的
即使很多一起过的
想起的通通你的
为着是浪漫的爱情
通通都可再见但承诺可再听
什么可不变色oh baby
当晚与你记住蒲公英
今晚偏偏想起风的清劲
回忆不再受制于我我承认
回忆也许你的
当晚与你记住流水声
今晚站在大地自己倾听
难道送别你回头总是虔诚
谁能怪我总是太感性
当晚与你记住蒲公英
今晚偏偏想起风的清劲
回忆不再受制于我我承认
回忆也许你的
当晚与你记住流水声
今晚站在大地自己倾听
难道送别你回头总是虔诚
谁能怪我总是太感性

Contest was cancel?

2009-09-10T17:29:00.000-07:00

WTF? When i prepare all the things he suddenly told me the contest was cancel.. Funny! =.=
doesn't matter.. but i just feel angry that i cannot go shooting this is the point that i feel angry.. some more nobody fetch me go school. Luckily Roxasl can fetch me.. =.=lll

Nothing i can do

2009-09-10T08:50:00.000-07:00

I don't need to do anything cause i know time will prove everything even explain also i feel it's useless.. Maybe this's my fault or .. I don't know.. I don't care anymore.. useless if i think too much. People won't care also.. Just do what i want.. Who care?!

Tomorrow morning will going to round Penang Island with Aaron them.. total got 6 ppl there.. Is that fun?

Life's Suck! (09.09.09)

2009-09-08T21:19:00.001-07:00

Maybe i too kind sure you guys would think im good to bully.. Since u guys think im good bully mean force me to change.. Change attitude? Easy way!Some of them i won't cin cai to them redi.. Useless..
About him, im so angry about him.. keep kacau me but i get scolded from sis. What to do? I already told sis but she only said don't care about him. Like don't believe in me.. He keep sent me the pet society item. I already sent him back all but he still sent back.. I already warning him if send me back i will going to send to others. Luckily today is his birthday if not sure i scold him ask him don't kacau me again I Don't like him.. He come itself i never do anything why said until all my fault? NOT Fair!!

Actually today suppose to be happy because today is 09.09.09 a special day..
to everyone is a good or special day but to me is a bad day..Although it is a special day..

Sometime no need to think about others feeling cause they never think about my feeling.. This is what i know.. People will only know your fault when they fault they won't feel it and this is what i know too..
Can anyone feel that?
You know what i feel when people think u are good to bullying?
No more kind! I won't so kind to them anymore..
Even they not feeling to mix with me or hang out with me also i don't care anymore..

缺德的我

2009-09-07T10:59:00.000-07:00

我真的觉得我很缺德。有些事我跟本不因该想，不因该做但我偏偏做了。但我真的不能忍受我做的一切。我想清楚了，如我在这样下去那我不会刊垂忘掉。不过我做得到吗？我希望当我忘了这件事的其间不要在提起。《我会扯低忘掉》我相信我做得到，以前能现在也能。

我不会在像以前的我了，如很小事骂我，我一定反脸。我不会在手下流情。太荒茂了。
为何我会变成这样？我很讨厌‘缺德’ 但我还是做了。
我真的不敢相信，我竟然做了些缺德的东西。

[ 神，请原谅我的缺德。对不起！]

The Celebration of You

2009-09-06T08:53:00.000-07:00

Hey i really hope to celebrate with you.. Would you accept me? I know you got work i can go find you after you rest. Would you give me a chance to celebrate with you? I hope that you will asnwer yes sure..

God bless me i really hopw to celebrate with her..

Never say Yes

2009-09-06T06:57:00.000-07:00

Did i change my attitude here??
why most of the people said im different like last time?!?!

From now onwards i won't always keep answer people 'Yes' 'Ok' 'No Problem'
I'll only say 'No'
unless i feel pity or what reason only i'll say yes..
cause if i say yes to them they will only think that im good to bully...
this attitude i should change..

3 September 09 is The Worst Day

2009-09-03T20:46:00.000-07:00

Yesterday it hapened until too rush. I can't accept the happen.. I hate him so much.. I hate she too..
Actually i have nothing to post anymore..
all the bad thing don't remind again..
let it dissappear.. Gone!

Thanks For Coming

2009-08-31T08:30:00.000-07:00

Turtle thanks a lot.. You really listen to what im say.. I want see you, you really come.
Luackily u coming if not i'll more miss you..
Im happy enough even though her 1 friend come with her..
Really Thanks a lot..
from today on ward i no need to go queensbay work again..
quite feeling sad, i don't know why..
last time sure i'll very excited..
Actually when she came that time im full of charge but after she back became bettery low..
Everytime when she came i also get some surprise & shock..
Feeling nice.. LOL
Feeling good.. cause long time never order her redi..
almost 8 month redi.. since when i order her is on sept 08
i feeling excited..Hahahahahaha

2009-08-29T12:02:00.000-07:00

爱很简单 - 陶喆

忘了是怎么开始
也许就是对你
有一种感觉
忽然间发现自己
已深深爱上你
真的很简单
爱得地暗天黑都已无所谓
是是非非无法决择
没有后悔为爱日也去跟随
那个疯狂的人是我
喔......
I LOVE YOU
无法不爱你
BABY
说你也爱我
I LOVE YOU
永远不愿意
BABY
失去你
不可能更快乐
只要能在一起
做什么都可以
虽然世界变个不停
用最真诚的心
让爱变得简单
爱得地暗天黑都已无所谓
是是非非无法决择
没有后悔为爱日也去跟随
那个疯狂的人是我
喔......
I LOVE YOU
我一直在这里
BABY
一直在爱你
I LOVE YOU YES I DO
永远都不放弃
这爱你的权利
如果你还有一些困惑
OH NO
请贴着我的心倾听
听我说着爱你
YES I DO
COME ON NOW
I LOVE YOU
我一直在这里
BABY
一直在爱你
I LOVE YOU
永远都不放弃
这爱你的权利

Down

2009-08-29T10:51:00.000-07:00

Today i don't really feel happy.. Too much complained. I thought today will more happy than everyday i had been cross but it's not. When will i get a different life? Or im not suit to have friends? Last time when im in secondary also i'll feel left out or lonely even now also i can feel it.. Is already 2pm. I can't sleep again.. here some more got more than 5 chicken wings to waiting for me to eat..
Why when i having fun she also will appear in my heart? I hate what she did.. She love to do what she like never think about others.. haiz..
I scare to lose her.. Actually im so worry/scare..

Actually when this yesterday morning i already felt this bbq not fun already.. I got this feeling..
Even they are here for me.. I don't mean anything but so far i never get any excited feeling. Only got 1 time i feel excited. It's when she chat with me. I really feel happy..

想你想得好苦。。 Z.Z
“xiang ni xiang de hao ku"
她看起来有点傻瓜像但傻瓜得来还带了一些可爱。可爱的她无法让我不得不想她。
She look a bit stupid but she looks cute too.. " ke ai de ta wu fa rang wo bu de bu xiang ta"
我每天都在想你，每一天都会比前一天还要想你。
Everyday also i'll miss you, Everytday miss you more than yesterday.
你真的让我想你想得好苦。
"ni zhen de rang wo xiang ni xiang de hao ku"

Last time when i fall with shu also i never get this feeling even when i on with my ex.

From My Heart

2009-08-28T22:35:00.000-07:00

叫我如何不得不想你呢？做不到。我能用我这培子来爱你，如果你能留在我身边。我想照顾你，关心你，疼你，宠你，爱护你。

Got that chance i'll treat you nicely.. Better than everyone.. Raining day will make me more miss you.. What are you doing right now? I kinda miss you right now..

Miss You

2009-08-27T09:40:00.000-07:00

She can totally kipnap my heart.. She can set me happy or sad in which day she want..
I really miss her so much..

" I miss you, I miss your smile
And I still shed a tear every once in a while
And even though it's different now
You're still here somehow
My heart won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you, sha la la la laI miss you "

But i don't know why she can online so early..
she no need to work?
what she doing?
some more ask me to wait her but at last she off redi.
message her also no respone?
anything happen?
sometime it is nothing but also will feel worry about her..

Recently always keep raining,
will she feel cold?
im feeling like going to bring some cloth for her.. *sweat*

I can't control my mind for missing u so much..
my brain is keep changing ur photo..
Help!!

She Was Message Me & Chat With Me In MSN

2009-08-26T10:04:00.000-07:00

Ohh no she message me, She message me first!!!!
Today im so happy , Excited..
both of us some more chat at msn.. i got her photo finally..
just now i feel sleepy redi.
Luckily i haven't sleep if not i can't chat with her redi..
Today i really super happy & excited..

Oh no i really can't sleep today.. HELP!!!
My blood is higher than mountain now!!
I don't even know how to explain it..
Too excited..
Now is already 2.15am she going to sleep now..
she some more ask me to sleep early..
Wow..my god! Hell..
Can you imagine how crazy am i right now? Hahahaha
3am i have to sleep now tomorrow have to going to work..
*forcing myself to sleep*

电脑白痴与电脑天才

2009-08-26T03:46:00.000-07:00

电脑白痴，你还好吧? 电脑天才很想你也。电脑天才以有2天没见到电脑白痴了。电脑天才真的很想很想念电脑白痴。到底电脑白痴还记得电脑天才吗？电脑白痴工作忙吗？很累吧？记得不要太累电脑天才会很伤心。

其实电脑天才很想把他所要问的东西都告诉你但他竟然没勇气把他告诉电脑白痴。
没用的电脑天才。其时电脑天才很后悔为什么他最后没把真像告诉电脑白痴。当时的电脑天才想准备告诉电脑白痴到最后还是没说。

电脑天才真的很白痴。

其时，电脑天才永远都会把电脑白痴记在脑海里。虽然电脑白痴和电脑天才相遇了不是很久，但电脑天才永远都会记得电脑白痴。

电脑天才很讨厌看到电脑白痴的背后，让我远远的望这她的背影心里带这一幅想念的念头。真的很难受。电脑天才差不多每分每秒都在想念这电脑白痴，但电脑白痴一点都不知道。
这是电脑天才自做自受吧了。

其实电脑天才有一件事想问电脑白痴，不过他最后决定不问，因为他不想知道。
这个移问是：“到现在为止你找到了男友了吗”

恐怕电脑天才不会见到电脑白痴很多面。你知道电脑天才有多伤心吗？电脑天才以花了多少时间去忘了电脑白痴，当电脑天才没有目标时他也过得很开心时，电脑白痴又出现了。好复杂的电脑天才只能呆呆的想念这电脑白痴。

Designed By Kyle, Me

2009-08-25T21:36:00.001-07:00

2009-08-25T21:26:00.000-07:00

She And Me

She is back,
but i won't get.

She is happy
I am sad.

She enjoying,
I am Suffering.

She is brave,
I am shy.

I am thinking of her,
she is thinking of other.

Created By Kyle, Me

Kyle's On Confusing

2009-08-25T19:49:00.000-07:00

Confusing Confusing.. I don't know what i want actually..
I really miss her but at the same time i feel angry n hate her.
I want stop thinking about you but i can't control my mind to think of you..

But i would like to special thanks to Ling you.. yesterday chat with me only i won't feel so sad. Thanks!

Confused
I miss her, I miss her.
when will this feeling stop,
when did it start
how can I listen to my mind
without breaking my heart.

I am so confused,
what should I do?
I can't think of anything
except of you.

Should I ignore you
or just give it time
I can't think straight
my heart controls my mind.

Created By Kyle, Me

Missin' Her

2009-08-25T07:03:00.000-07:00

Today she never come.. Actually she never come never mind but the thing was worst is .. im waiting for her to come.. How can i do this?!?! I want to know what she think.. i really don't know what she think.. What she want for me?? Play?
Actually i Hate "Gotta be Somebody" this song.. But i keep listen to this song..When the song was play & i listen to this song i'll think back last time we meet.. she will work until 31th of August.. Maybe this's my last chance to meet her.. If my parents really close it then i'll never meet her again.. I already lost her phone number why she still want to message me??

Christine : I really don't know.. I just feel that i really miss her so much.. Got her my working time will pass very fast & i feel energy to work for it.. But when i know that she won't come whole day will pass it slow..Can cause by Lazy..

Why want to meet her again?? *sigh* Really feel suck!!
Don't hurt me please..
不要给我受到伤害好吗？
心里很瞧粹的我不该怎么办
No one can listen to what i feel..

Hate
I feel noise to myself,
I hate what i get,
I hate what i have.
When i need someone to listen to ,
i'll always find no one to listens to.
I am sad, I am havin' problem,
There's no one beside me.
I'll always facing problem to myself.
I hate myself ,
I hate myself..

Met Her Again

2009-08-24T08:27:00.000-07:00

No, I met her again.. I get shock again.. She was came.. Im scared to looked at her.. She some more sit infront of my counter.. My God! Should i happy to met her again? Im trying to not to talk to her even smile with her.. But at last she message me.. Actually i don't dare to look at her.. Now she keep messaging me.. Now i Get her MSN email redi.. Just now she said she want go bath then i never reply her redi. I thought she won't reply me redi Hoow i know she message me again.. To last time she won't reply me redi. I really don't know what she think.. Really " Complicated" What can i do now?? Should i keep contact her huh? Actually im not suppose to contact her.. Just now she asked me why never smile then i asnswer her got u never attention on me sure don't see me smile. You know what she answer? She said she got attention on me i don't know nia..
I really miss her so much.. What can i do!!

Hate Injection!!

2009-08-19T04:17:00.000-07:00

Oh no~~ Hate injection so much. it's was painful~ Some more inject until so long.. I never get H1N1 but this feeling really bad.. Just now doctor let me suck something it was taking long time to suck the thing.. really ''suck''.. I don't know why should injection but after injected and suck that thing feeling better now..Im alright jsut headache but mom keep forcing me go see doctor.. Doctor gave me all the medicine.. Hate medicine too..Arghh~~

Suffering

2009-08-18T04:34:00.000-07:00

Why this time i sick until so suffering? Just now feeling vomit some more coughing.. I have never test this feeling before... it's suffer alot.. When i feel suffer sure no one is there.. Good also atleast no one look at my fucking face.. Now i cough until 2 side of my stomach pain.. What can i do??
Don't know i'll keep headache.. Feeling not good.. Really bad bad..

Kill me please i don't want this kind of feeling..
What is the purpose i live in this world if i live until so suffer..
Why should i face alot ofo problem there?
NOT FAIR!!! NOT FAIR to me!!!

Im Sick!

2009-08-17T00:33:00.000-07:00

Oh no~ Today morning i suddenly got Fever & Flu.. After that keep Coughing..My whole body was like jump into a place that which is in fire. *burning* Help!!
Will i get H1N1? No~ im scared injection!!! No Injection!!
My Life Would Suck Now~~ How Suck is me? Now i have to wear mask.. Can you imagine that you wearing a mask which is Hot & Ugly..

My Special Feeling

2009-08-16T08:33:00.000-07:00

I suddenly got a feeling.. I don't know how to explain but.. I can feel it. I feel nothing is important now.. I can even lose everything.. Lose the world lose my dearest guitar lose my money lose my friends lose my my family.. Everything.. Why? How can i feeling this? Thehe only thing i can feel it now is im lying on the places that which is a little bit darkness + grayness & 1 big road there..

My feeling now would be worst than last time.. Now i don't even like to talk anymore.. but if i don't talk in class everyone will think im having in a bad mood. What should i do? I really hate this kind of feeling..

Im sick! Keep coughing keep coughing.. Why don't i get fever then i can lying on the bed for 1 week.. Let me rest for 1 week or 2 week.. Luckily i never get an accident if NOTi will choose not to wake up anymore..
Exhausting feeling..
Im sick but still have to work..
sometime i really cannot tahan for coughing it's very painful.. Bless Me!!
If not Just let me Rest & Peace please~~
sometime will feel headache , Heat , faint even flu..
What's going? huh?

No more colourful in my life.. All dissappear in my hand. i have been distroyed all..
No more Hope No More regret..
My bestfriend in secondary school is coming back to me.. We would actually slowily create a new topic.. Not bad.
The word of regret was gone..

Do i need someone to care?
No i guess.. But maybe sometime..
To my feeling i don't think everyone will care me..
They don't even know why im having this mood ,
Why? What's wrong? Any problem? Do i need a help?
They don't even care all the question..

What If i die

2009-08-15T08:32:00.000-07:00

What if monday everyone can't see me again ? Sad? Cry? Nothing hapen? No feeling? Happy? Going to celebrate? A lot of reason there.. Some you don't even know what they think.. Who will love me actually? Family? Friends? Teachers? Strangers? Ghost? Alien? Oh no im crap here.. Ask all the stupid question..

Im bored~
Actually i still got 1 homework here but lazy to do.. Keep chatting playing & listening but no doing..

About Him

2009-08-14T09:24:00.000-07:00

My god! What the Fxxk he doing.. Keep calling me in msn.. I already stop chatting with him totally no more contact but he still make me feel noise.. Hate him so much.. I totally won't fall on him.. Feeling like scolding him..
*thinking* can you please stop contact me & asked this and that.. i really hate it.. like ma e poh.. Arghh~~

Anti H1N1

2009-08-14T08:27:00.000-07:00

Quick Design:

Too many people get H1N1.. We should take care.. but i already sick.. What the hell..

Shit! Did i get H1N1..Oh no then if ya sure i'll die faster.. Haha

Actually all should use their mask nowaday we didn't use very dangerous.. Anyone who got H1N1 some more stand beside you touching you or talk to you i won't know.. so be careful everyone..

Finished!

2009-08-14T08:08:00.000-07:00

This's my first design in book jacket..
How was it?

I have done my homework for book jacket..ahaha. 1 day can finished design & print out.. Luckily.. Cause that one i don't really can accept so the best is design a new one..

Yeah! I have finished my design.. Love it! ( i mean free now)

Me Myself No More She & her

2009-08-14T07:48:00.000-07:00

No more She & her? Is it? If then i should congrate to myself..lol The most important is She & her is already dissappear it in my heart.. Should celebrate actually..lol

Let me talk about Mr Tang.. I feel .. actually i feel that the time when i don't talk to him then miss ong slowly look like don't really answer or talk with me until today nearly finished the class i talked to him then after only she talked to me.. All about this is in my guessing.. The actual happen i won't know..

Erm, how about my friends suzan & my bro aaron? My bro was lucky actually he almost fight back with the fuckin sickness but suzan not so strong until now she still sick.. This month she still got alot of works there. Now she sick do u think she will keep go on to work together with her sickness? Haiz sometime im really sad when she told what to me..
"Oi! When u will get well? long time no see redi miss u lo.."
=.= quite stupid what im return here..

Actually sometime she(N) would suddenly appear in my head.. what's wrong with me? Quite a long time never meet her i should forget her even her face.. but .. Quite miss her.. I know it's useless when i miss her.. Anyway i have no choice for all this.. Sometime can't control.. I lost her Number too.. Good what she didn't contact me & i didn't contact back.. keep the distance like this.. Maybe what i return here was suck or =.= but who care i just wanna espress what i want..

Let me talk about this girl she really change alot.. Even when we talk something or what she wont get mad easily redi.. Like last time sure get mad & angry people.. Last time she don't care what people think She just think Everyone should listen to her let her win & she's a queen in this school. so she really change a bit.. Anyway keep on! Gambateh!

Im Back!!

2009-08-12T03:41:00.000-07:00

Wassup guys!! Im back.. lol Quite a long time never update my blog..Hee
=.= crazy me..ahaha

I think this's the 1st post that my sound so happy..Haha.

"My lips like sugar, my lips like sugar
this candy got you sprung, this candy got you sprung
so call me ur sugar so call ur sugar
you love you some, you love you some"
*singing*

haha.
song by Flo Rida
nice song!

Girl you my sugar, i call you candy
and tonight
im gonna get me some, get me some
girl you my sugar, I call you Candy
and tonight
im gonna get me some, get me some sugar
*singing again*
:p

You & Me

2009-08-02T07:14:00.000-07:00

What day is it? And in what month?

This clock never seemed so alive

I can't keep up and I can't back down

I've been losing so much time

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do

Nothing to lose

And it's you and me and all other people

And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

One of the things that

I want to say just aren't coming out right

I'm tripping on wordsYou've got my head spinning

I don't know where to go from here

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do

Nothing to prove

And it's you and me and all other people

And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now

I can't quite figure out

Everything she does is beautiful

Everything she does is right

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do

Nothing to lose

And it's you and me and all other people

And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

and me and all other people with nothing to do

Nothing to proveAnd it's you and me and all other people

And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?And in what month?

This clock never seemed so alive

Who I Miss? Who?? Did I?

2009-07-30T11:06:00.000-07:00

Am i missin someone there? Today's feeling suck! Don't know what am i doing there.. Can i just act like nothing when i having problem or feel sad? I hate to show people my stupid face..

Im Lazy!

2009-07-28T08:31:00.000-07:00

Sorry toshii i'll reply you late.. Cause im so lazy to reply or post.. Tired & Lazy..
Hope you Don't mind..

Should I Change Collage??

2009-07-25T09:15:00.000-07:00

My mom said she wanna ask a collage for me but i don't know whether true or not. If yea then this is the moment to let me think.. I hate this collage so much even all the teachers..
Always talk about Asignment.. We just keep on doing asignment for them not learn..(To my feel) They really suck!!
My mom so agree me to change too.. But ...*Thinking*
I don't know what to do actually..
i guess you guys will ask me to change..
Toshii you too right?

My Tuesday ( I'm Tired!! )

2009-07-21T06:24:00.000-07:00

Im tired! Im tired! My head was like heavy but homework... Haven't finish!! What the hell!!
The stupid '' Observation Study For Mobile Phone '' need to draw 30 part of the phone.. Tomorrow need to pass up redi but i still left 24 part to go.. My God! God Bless me!!!!!!

Today went to Prangin Mall with Yens & Jun.. I Was treat them roti only.. I want treat them food but they don't want..
The time when i walked with Jun I SAW Yean Ling and i was Hi to her.. Everything was pass now we were just look like the first time when we met. Actually i Got SHOCK when i suddenly saw her.. Can count as suprise.. LOL ( Don't you think a side)

Additional Part :
Actually i hope not to let them know what i writen here.. Cause i just wanna express my feeling here.. Im NOT try to show them what im thinking..
Hope that they won't come read my blog! *praying*

华文版 02 （很累的我想放弃这一切）

2009-07-20T08:26:00.000-07:00

她没次都说她很累但她有没有想过我也很累呢? Okie! 有可能我不知道她的难过或者是她的过去。不过你也要想到别人的感受。你知道你的一个生气能让人觉得厌倦吗？拜托！不要为了一点小事就生气，你难受我也很难受，只是朋友为何要搞得那么复杂？连一点小事也不能忍吗？你有没有为我们想过？
以前的我不会去安慰或者说些话嚷人开心的。你不爽那就算。现在的我觉得够了！我以做了我因该和不因该的事了，

如你们还是觉得我做的东西是不够的话那我无能为力了！

“ 我真的很差吗？我不够关心你们吗？还是不够在乎你们？
为何你们每次都说我在欺负你们又没关心你们？ ”

不错，我认识你们的确是认事了很多东西也很开心，不过我也同时见识了很多不开心的事。
其实我也没后悔认识你们，唯一我觉得最后悔的是进入了一间我不因该进的学校。太烂了!
他们不会为了我而开心或伤心而是她们给我的感觉是他们跟本不在呼我。

有谁能告诉我为什么我在家的情绪和在学校的情绪是不一样的？

其实没可望些什么，我只希望要快乐的过生活。
我不大烦这一些，我还要烦我家人的事情。
今天我的家人又在吵架了！好烦噢！
我以控制我自己别想太多了。还是没用！我真没用！
可怜的我只能把这一切收藏在一个永远没人知道的地方，那就是我心里。

坚持？
我能坚持多久？
。。。

I Don't Like Her

2009-07-20T07:58:00.000-07:00

I don't like her! Both of us are just a friends.. Nothing much! Please don't you guys keep saying i like her.. I Never plan to chase her or what. I just wanna set her in my bestfriend list but i guess she will not set me in her bestfriend list.. Cause she got so much friends.. She won't reliase me..

About ling i don't know what she thinking actually.. Not only her suzan also the same.. I never say anything i just wanna know what you guys actually think..

I'm lost!

You know what i really change a lot after i enter this school.. They will not know.. Never!
* Who can actually understand me? *
But actually no one understand me also no that weird.. Cause i can't even understand myself..
I don't know what i want..

One last time..
I don't her! We are just a friend.
Don't you guys playing around ( I mean between me & her)

Impossible!!

2009-07-19T07:02:00.001-07:00

I don't like her ok.. Don't you guys keep saying i like her.. Impossible you know.. Ok wait i hope anyone don't mention her name if u know..
both of us just a friends.. Nothing much ok.. I don't wish to like her too.. Please don't make me fall on her.. PLEASE!!!
I DON'T LIKE HER!!!!
Don't ask me to think about it.. I won't! cause i don't like her..

Sorry Suzan!

2009-07-16T00:07:00.000-07:00

Sorry le suzan.. I should ask u 1 more time but you told me you won't so easy to get angry one.. Why today you so angry until don't want reply me?? Or u busying now? Don't play me la wei.. Don't because a little happen angry me.. No point! Hope you will reply me soon..

Luckily!!

2009-07-15T09:16:00.000-07:00

My mom was scolded me.. Just get scolded from her only.. After tomorrow nothing redi.. They was like never happe..lucky!! I though i will very teruk.. hit me maybe.. But never..

Toshii, you still having exam right now? ok or not? everything is under control huh? sure you will.. Haha.. Good luck anyway..

Second Time To Asked Me Change School

2009-07-14T04:07:00.000-07:00

First im going to apologize to two people..
First: Suzan
Hey suzan im so sorry about that.. Yea, you asked me to stay ur house but if i keep saying no also can and you some more gave me a imformation to asked me call back but i never listen to you so this's not your fault..Don't worry about me..(i know u won't too) Maybe it will take long time to get well.. Today i will get scold or hit from my mom and im ready for that.. Never mind le.. I was enjoy yesterday.. Enough for that..

Second: My mom
Im so sorry for began so worry about me.. I knew that this's my fault. Overnight at her house without your permission.. NO next time.. I Promise !

Later is my time to die...

She was scolded me in the morning..That time i was in suzan's car. The things i feel sad is not my mom cried. it's the time when she feel bad for never take good care for me.. I thought she will scold me when im going back.. I really really Sorry!!

Maybe Is A Good News

2009-07-10T09:16:00.000-07:00

Toshii i got a good news here!! Im ok now! When they talked about him & her. I won't feel so angry redi. I just asked him to message her whether she back redi or not. Im teaching him how to message her. Since he said he is my bro then just teach him. He some more asked me i wont feel sad when they talked about him & her. I was answer '' not really'' I feel more better than last time..
Is that a good news toshii??
But ofcause sometime will miss her too.. Actually at the same time i asked him to message her, I feel like going to message her too but i never send. I let him ask.. Im was think to ask her whether she back redi? where are you? eat redi?
He said if nobody fetch her then how.. I answered him 'you go fetch her'..
Maybe i don't like this type of girl. I love the girl who like to stay at home.(yea ofcause will going out with her friends too but not like 1 girl 3 or 4 guy) The first time i knew this thing i was so worry about her actually.. After i heard from someone only i knew that she always like that.. Then nothing else i can say..
Actually i sure that she wont choose me so i just give up. Maybe he got chance so just help him up..

I don't know whether she will angry me or not if again accidentally read my blog maybe will angry (i guess) Hope she won't angry le.
Actually today im thinking to talk with her but after suzan called her, she was like .. Don't really answer so i never call her.

just discuss with him about sunday night go out for choosing photo.. Actually im thinking to ask her out but still don't know whether she got come back from town redi or not.. If i message her feel weird cause im not talking to her in this few days anyway. So maybe i'll ask him to ask her.. Cause im not suppose to ask her now.. He suppose to ask..
I scared i'll fall in again & i hope it will not happen..
Today i really happy cause i never show them my stupid face.. LOL

Sometime i don't know why i feel sad when i heard something about him & her but is still going to help me.. Actually i did that happen but i'll feel sad.. What am i doing? *sight*
The most funny is i never ask her.. Everything i want to ask i just ask from him so i think he will ask her.. so i can know from him..

My Thursday

2009-07-09T20:20:00.000-07:00

I was going to Suzan' house.. After class she fetch me back her house. We was saving some photo to make a collage for our classmate. That was fun.. Cause their face look funny. Haha
Actually after i went to her house listened to what she said. I felt that im not so pity in this world. Ofcause still got a lot of people pity than me. After her story made me feel better right now.
I feel better today..
I trying to set all this as normal as i have face..
Maybe after today i can tell u the answer.. I know u hope to know my good news here. Sure i won't let you feel dissapointed on me.. Hehe

Wait my good news.. LOL

今天的我又撑过一天

2009-07-08T06:22:00.000-07:00

难受的我又撑过一天了。本来今天想逃课，不过到最后还是上了这一堂课。到现在唯子这一堂课是最难受。对，有可能他们觉得没什么，我想这是我的问题吧。他每次都要跟我讲他和她之间的事。他到底了解我的感受吗？对，我说过可以追她不待表可以跟我讲你们两的过程。每当他跟我讲他们两的过程我都会很难受。昨天他去找她，他还帮她作了7面的 Sketching book。不是我不西欢他帮她，你想如果有一天她真的爱上了她，我会怎么想。我只能的看着他们谈情说爱。你想，这种心情爽吗？簡之爽到说不出口。

我病了！最好病了3天不用上班。那该多好。躺在床上什么都不用管该多好。

Thinking to Transfer To Others School

2009-07-07T09:38:00.000-07:00

He Chasing Her

2009-07-07T04:47:00.001-07:00

Sometime im sad but i'll remember what Toshii told. I will always keep my sadness in my heart and i won't show it to all my friends that im sad..

He really chase her now.. what is my feeling right now? Don't know..
I some more teach him.. Im i crazy?? huh?? But no need to teach also he will go ahead. I was told him i got a bit beh syok she understand too.. After we discuss i think we won't quarrel because of her.. Both of us still are the battle of the guitar hero..LOL Now he going to find her.. So good.. Sure i feel abit beh song but sure i will control myself right..
You read all this you will feel swaet about us..
Yea, I know something that im not suppose to know.. but both of us settle already so i guess nothing happen already.. I hope everything is under control..

As i can see, She treat me so bad sure no chance.. Maybe he look different.. No bad no good (i guess) so he still got chance.. Sure i won't do something bad about them.. Maybe i will help me..
Don't worry about me cause i will be fine soon.. Like what suzan told me, *I gonna be strong* lyric by miley cyrus the climb
Just check my latest post see how is my result.. See whether can face it or not..LOL
i feel sweat about everything..

Im Weird ( Now & The Past)

2009-07-06T09:56:00.000-07:00

Im giving him a chance to chase her.. Am i crazy? Actually i give him chance i will feel a bit .. i don't know how to say but this few days i really treat her bad.. She always gave me a bad feeling to her.. She can't even help me when my friends talked about me *we was played around* She would only help my friends. I don't know what she think actually.. Since she don't like me then i just let him go. If he really want to chase her i can't do anything also.. Last time i would always looking at her see whether she got online or not but now .. not always. Sometime she online also i didn't call her. Maybe i will slowly forget about her.. If i do then this's my first time to change my target so fast.. Last time i called her, both of us would actually talk more than 1 hour but that day i was called her about 5 minute only.
She was change her attitude a bit. Last Time she don't know her homework, she would asked me to do for her but now i said wanna help her, she said she wanna try first. Not bad what.. She is changing. About hanging out with friends. I don't know she still got hanging out with her friends or not. (i mean went out at midnight) If not always then sure she really got change..

* If u accidentaly read it and u angry then sorry about that..*
but i guess she won't spend her time to read my blog.. Hehe

Snap Shoot at Sunday

2009-07-05T19:23:00.000-07:00

A Special sign that i love to show..

2009-07-05T19:14:00.000-07:00

...┏━━━━━━━┓
┏┫　　　　｜｜｜┣┓ 　　　
┗┫━━　┃　━━┣┛ 　or ar flying over and i feel sweat..
. .┃　━━━━━　┃　　
. .┗━━━┳━━━┛

Quite a simple & short post here..
can cause by stupid post.. LOL

About Guitar Hero

2009-07-05T09:36:00.000-07:00

Uh no.. tomorrow will going to buy another Guitar Hero's controller.. (sure would not let my mom know) Haha.. My friend brought it today. He show me too. That's so nice.. Nice than mine.. I have some photo here to share with you guys..

The first photo i upload this the one i told that he brought it today.. Look! So nice..

Today i brought a model guitar from Botanica Garden.. Actually cheaper than S&J so much..

Today i went to Snap shoot but i will upload tomorrow cause now feel sleepy..

I have no comment with it

2009-06-30T20:09:00.000-07:00

I was cried.. I cannot tahan anymore.. I hope not to stay at home.. Why? Why im cried? Im not suppose to cry.. I have to be strong.. I feel sad for everything.. Now i don't want to talk don't want to stay with them.. I'll back to my room.. I won't stay at that floor anymore. I hate my family so much.. I stay with them is just survive and work to get money.. I never tell them how i feel.. When i sad and worry they will never know.. They will never ask too. This's why i keep so much recret in my mind.. I don't believe that i can't survive without them. Maybe i survive without them my life will hard but i feel this's happy to me. Yea, Im still studying but ..
I don't know, I really don't know what to do..
Im not happy with everything.. Which place can actually let me rest and relax??
'' Rest & Peace '' ?
No, I think i won't so stupid.. *I guess*
Should i need someone to console?
No, i guess.. cause i scared i will cry infornt of the one who console me..
I won't do this kind of thing. It will not happen.. NEVER!!!

没办法接受这一切。。很难受！不想在受到这些伤害。离开我好吗？拜托！

Quarrel With Someone

2009-06-28T08:18:00.000-07:00

Why you always want to quarrel with me?? You know what i feel actually huh?? I don't know what you feel maybe u feel nothing when we quarrel but i really feel sad..
This few day mood really bad. I can't laugh for the whole. I never laugh but yesterday went to Queensbay with keow & christine only i got laugh. How can my life became so suck??
Just now i saw the photo when my life in sch. Really enjoy enjoy.. I really really miss the moment.. I cannot get back anymore..
Now starting to feel hopeless to my classmate..Im tired for everything now. I just want to stay alone quietly..I begin feel hopeless to everything.. If it's mine then accept if not mine then let it go.. I won't care anymore.. Useless if i care..
Yesterday i went to Queensbay Mall wateched 'Transformers 2' again. Keow so bad, never told me. If i know i won't go watch again.. Some more no popcorn. How hungry is me? I some more watched until slept. After we went to Gurney's Mcd. Actually first we went to Greenlane there but totally full then went to Gurney there. Yesterday quite early we went until 1am something but after reached home get scold from my mom. =.=
This few days always quarrel with people.. What happen to me? I quarrel with my 1st sis, 3rd sis and Ling. I really feel angry!! Im so mad..

Tired

2009-06-26T10:07:00.000-07:00

Toshii sorry im so lazy to reply. Hehe

Wednesyday sleep at 4am
Thursday sleep at 5am
Friday sleep at 6am

Friday night went to watched ' Transformers 2 '. I love thier cars & motor very nice but movie not bad. Not so nice. After i watched around 3am something. We went to ' Greenhouse' chat some of them ate. Then we went to round somewhere near Batu Ferringi * i guess* After when we back around 5am. When i reach home still cannot sleep so online until 5 something offline already but still can't sleep so i played my phone until 6am only i sleep. Then morning 8am have to wake up. Now Saturday night at 1.24am.. Feel sleepy now..

They go to mcd now. *sigh* I can't go.. I have a lot of homework. Saturday and Sunday have to work.. Tomorrow im going to watch movie at night..

My Tuesday

2009-06-23T19:34:00.000-07:00

Actually i should sorry to someone..Maybe i said something im not suppose to said.. Im sorry! But trust me after you cry will better than last time and i hope not to see u cry again..
Actually how to make them happy? I should learn more but i only know to learn how to make people happy but i don't know how to make myself happy.. *WTH*
Sometime i feel tired to facing everyone even my parents and friends.. Im afraid..Tired, im tired.. really really tired..
Something i don't know why you angry and angry for what.. why should i guess this guess that? Can i straight away get the answer? I don't want to guess.. Please don't let me guess again..
Why i don't have any confident with me? A little confident also don't have.. Even asked me to know a people also feel no confident.. WHY?? What happen to me? Last time i won't feel it. I mean last time won't feel so terrible.. Now totally cannot.. Erm.. What am i talking about?? Shit! =.=
Am i insance?

Sigh..

2009-06-21T08:59:00.000-07:00

Homework cannot finish. Im so lazy to finish too.. *sigh*

Nowadays im getting worst and worst.. You meet me you will actually think im fine but actually i was insane in the jungle.. Can you take me out of the jungle? Or maybe kill me..
From now on ward i feel lazy to do all my homework. What's going on with me? When teacher teach also cannot concentrate.. Working also lazy.. I don't know what im doing.. Anything also cannot enter to my memory. My memory is blank. Just like Desktop without software..

Christine: I also hope to sleep until the day i feel ok and everything is all right only wake up!!

2009-06-20T08:36:00.000-07:00

What to do?? 2 also my friends. Who i want to help?? 2 also like my another friend.. *sigh* My problem can't even solve by myself some more .. What can i do !! Why you guys like to complain everything to me?? When A told me how was A and B together actually im not dare to tell C(another friend that like B) If im going to tell C sure C will hate A again. Sure i don't want them to fight again.. But if i never tell C will hate me If i tell A will hate me..
Toshii, Can you tell me what to do... So headache !!

I cannot solve my problem, I still cannot control myself.. The time when i free almost will think about X. Feeling want kill myself. Im so hate myself.. 1 song suit me. that is "I hate myself for loving you".Time will take off everything.. This word really Suck! So Sick!! I think time will make me more confuse.

For example like a clothe, if you dont like to wear force also won't feel happy when you wear it. If the clothe not suitable for you to wear force also will break the clothe. At last what i mean is to let me know that things cannot FORCE..
Be stronge baby.. Don't cry because of this.. Useless.. If B don't choose you cry also no use. I understand ur feeling.. You have to be stronge if not when they get a BF will more hurt on that time.. So when the things not yet happen we gonna forget them soon. If not the happen coming to corner cry also useless already.. Trust me.. We forget it together ok?

Today i was chat with F.Ling. I chat with her , i feel.. She change a lot.. LOL

My favarite song list on June

2009-06-19T04:57:00.000-07:00

My favorite song list on June (Include old song):

1. Hatin' On The Club by Rihanna *highlight*
2. Right Round by Flo Rida
3. Broken String by James Morrison
4. Crazier by Taylor Swift
5. I Will Be by Leona Lewis
6. Beautiful by Akon
7. Shone by Flo Rida
8. Eh,Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say) by Lady Gaga
9. If U Seek Amy by Britney Spears
10. I Do Not Hook Up by Kelly Clarkson
11. OohOoh Baby by Britney Spears
12. Paranoid by Jonas Brothers
13. The Climb by Miley Cyrus
14. Hoedown Throwdown by Miley Cyrus
15. Love Games by Lady Gaga
16. Boom Boom Pow by Black Eyed Peas

What Can I Do....??

2009-06-19T01:36:00.001-07:00

Nothing??

I love today's wheather so much cause it's raining day.. Suit me.. Today's wheather really suit me because today's wheather look like me sometime cold sometime hot.

Thinking .. Thinking .. Thinking ..

What can i do for stop think of someX?
Don't hope too much.. Im just hope to stay with X. I know X won't like me but just need a .. What? I don't know what i want.. *sigh*
=.=''

Kyle's Blog

蛮稳定

10| 01|10

07|01|10

时间的问题

01|01|10 Fri 11:48AM

what i feel

A Bad X'mas Day! [ 24th + 25th ]

im nerves

More closer will get far distance

模糊

Keep Thinking & Guessing

你在我心目中的地位

就那么几分钟的相处

Having a new choice

miss (im having a problem)

Sad Case

what she thinking of?

A Day To Penang National Marathon

can u feel me?

Pressure

Is that getting closer?

16 november 09 (sun)

Is That A New Country Here?

Tired but never give up

Just looked around to someone's profile

等待的爱情

竟然有人让我心淡了(真真的觉得心淡）

他开结了我吗？

我该怎么办？

My Tuesday

毫无意义

让我最生气的一天

爱情之大地震在二零零九年十月一号（无聊编）

Jesse McCartney - How Do You Sleep

HATE OCT

无名氏

Food Poisioning Or Sunburn

Thursday

Raining Day ( What am i suppose to do? )

21 september 09

关于我的生日

Hopeless

我的回忆不是我 - 海鸣威

Contest was cancel?

Nothing i can do

Life's Suck! (09.09.09)

缺德的我

The Celebration of You

Never say Yes

3 September 09 is The Worst Day

Thanks For Coming

Down

From My Heart

Miss You

She Was Message Me & Chat With Me In MSN

电脑白痴 与 电脑天才

Designed By Kyle, Me

Kyle's On Confusing

Missin' Her

Met Her Again

Hate Injection!!

Suffering

Im Sick!

My Special Feeling

What If i die

About Him

Anti H1N1

Finished!

Me Myself No More She & her

Im Back!!

You & Me

Who I Miss? Who?? Did I?

Im Lazy!

Should I Change Collage??

My Tuesday ( I'm Tired!! )

华文版 02 （很累的我想放弃这一切）

I Don't Like Her

Impossible!!

Sorry Suzan!

电脑白痴与电脑天才